Rules Of Seduction

I used to be very shy around men. I didn’t know how to flirt. Whenever I went out, I would end up feeling somewhat awkward and left behind (especially that my best friend was the queen of seduction).

So I took it as a challenge to learn how to flirt. I figured it can’t be a rocket science since so many people somehow manage to do it, do it well, and have fun doing it.

I knew that the key to seduction was self-confidence, but how could I feel confident if deep inside I didn’t truly believe I deserved love?

This is when I realised something. I didn’t need to be deserving of love to seduce. I didn’t need to be pretty enough or interesting enough for a man to want to date me. All I needed was to feel pretty and interesting enough for a man to want to talk to me – and that felt quite doable.

And so I put myself out there, and eventually started enjoying seduction so much, that today I teach techniques of seduction to my clients.

Here are my top 5 rules of seduction:

1. Have FUN!

Seduction is not a “life or death” situation. It’s a game and shouldn’t be taken too seriously.

We often make it a much bigger deal that it actually is, which adds unnecessary pressure to the process.

It’s time to say it out loud: you will not die if you won’t succeed with your seduction. In fact, you won’t even get rejected. Because if you’re playing the game with a light heart, people will want to join. They may not follow you all the way, but everyone enjoys some fun. In the worst case scenario, you’ll end up having a few nice moments with that guy or a girl from a bar. Not that scary, right?

2. Create a fantasy, an escape from reality

Most of us live quite a standard life. We wake up the same time every day, go through the same standard morning routine, commute, go to work, have a lunch break, then work again, commute back home, have dinner, watch some TV or go our with our friends, and fall sleep.

It’s normal to have a routine. However, as a seducer, you need to remember that as much as we need the routine, they also get boring after a while. Which is good news to you.

With your seduction, offer a break from that reality. Create the space where they will be able to forget their normal lives and drop into the world of fantasy.

You create such a space with how you dress, how you move, how you talk (and what you talk about), how you behave and what you do. And most of all – you create this fantasy with the experiences you’re offering the other person.

3. Play the game of familiarity & mystery

We like what we’re familiar with. We like people who are from the same country as we are, who like the same movies, who share our name, who attend the same events. The very first step in seduction is to create the feeling of familiarity with your target.

But you have to be very careful, because too much familiarity and the game is over.

Familiarity allows your target to feel safe with you and open up, but it will not create the curiosity, attraction or tension. For this you need mystery.

Let them wonder – about who you are, what you’re doing, what you’re like. Surprise them. Let them get to see some hidden parts of you, and then surprise them by revealing a part of you that does not fit with your image until now.

Keep them guessing. Offer them novelty every time you see them, and they will remain enchanted.

4. Slowww down…

We live in a fast world. We have little time and we want everything now – from food to sex. I am not the most patient person myself, so I know how hard it is, but it is truly essential for seduction to take things slowly.

Slowing down is a must. It creates a safe space for the other person to open up and allows to gradually build up tension and desire. Taking your time also shows that you care about them, and not just your physical needs. You’re showing them you’re willing to wait, that they are worth it. And this makes you more irresistible to them that any other “pick up” technique.

5. Don’t be afraid to stir strong emotions

From childhood we are tough how to behave (and how not to). You should say ‘thank you”, you shouldn’t take the last bite, you should let an elder person take the seat, you should share, you shouldn’t eat too much sugar… The list doesn’t end!

Though being nice is needed in our social interactions, it is not going to take you far in seduction.

Look at it as an opportunity to play some of your hidden desires and needs. You get to be rough, say things that may be considered inappropriate, do things you usually wouldn’t do.

Don’t be afraid to shock the other person. If you manage to stir strong emotions, you’re half way there. You want them to feel. You want the energy to build up. Once it’s awaken, you can direct it as you wish.

And remember, deep inside we all want to be a little bad and do things that are forbidden. We all want to give in to the temptation, but we are often too shy to do it on our own. Be that someone who takes them into the land of the dangerous, the taboo, the forbidden fruits.

Seduction is a very natural skill. Start playing around and you will notice how much fun it can be. And as with everything, the more you practice, the better you become.

So go out there even tonight and start using these 5 rules and let us know how they worked for you.

With love,

Magda Kay

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